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"THE GREATEST OF THESE-" 

WRITTEN BY 

LAURETTE TAYLOR 

A DIARY WITH PORTRAITS 
OF THE PATRIOTIC ALL-STAR 
TOUR OF ''OUT THERE 7 ' 




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COPYRIGHT DEPOSm 



"THE GREATEST OF THESE 



BY 

LAURETTE TAYLOR 




LAURETTE TAYLOR 



THE GREATEST OF 
THESE " 

WRITTEN BY 

LAURETTE TAYLOR 



A DIARY WITH PORTRAITS 
OF THE PATRIOTIC ALL-STAR 
TOUR OF "OUT THERE" 




NEW ^S^YORK 
GEORGE H. DORAN COMPANY 



tcp 1 ! 2- 



6W 



Copyright, 1918, 
By George H. Doran Company 



Printed in the United States of America 



OCT 10 Ibid l''r\ 

©GLA5G6120 r" 



DEDICATED TO 

J. HARTLEY MANNERS 

AND ALL OTHER FINE WRITERS 

WITH APOLOGIES FOR STEPPING HEAVILY INTO 

THEIR COUNTRY THAT THEY HAVE 

MADE SO BEAUTIFUL 



3>h( 



YOU MUST READ THIS AS IT IS NECESSARY TO 
THE PLOT! L. T. 

This is the history of "Three Weeks"— and that 
sentence was written to attract your attention. I 
have it? Then, imprimis: . . . 

This is the diary of a journey of mercy. Just as 
everybody can write one book on the war, through 
the inspiration of what he has seen, so I try this 
through the stimulus of what I have felt. And — 
because the second book of the suddenly-talented 
warrior sometimes proves that the muse gave him 
true voice only once, before the cities and easy liv- 
ing struck him dumb — I shall cheat the muse by 
writing only one! So whether you run as you read 
or read and then run, forgive me. 

Originally a group of us felt the need of as- 
sisting and arousing our country. Various schemes 
were discussed, and then Mr. Tyler (who loves to 
overcome the impossible) wished twenty-one light- 
less nights on the heavens, interviewed the constel- 
lations, and formed a band of sixteen stars to make 
giant collections throughout the country: Mrs. 
Fiske, Julia Arthur, Helen Ware, Laurette Tay- 
lor (3rd person), Beryl Mercer, George Cohan, 
George Arliss, James K. Hackett, H. B. Warner, 
James T. Powers, Chauncey Olcott, George Mac- 

vii 



™ You Must Read This As It 

Farlane, O. P. Heggie, Madame Eleanora de Cis- 
neros, Burr Mcintosh and De Wolf Hopper. 

J. Hartley Manners having written an inspired 
play of the war called "OUT THERE," a play 
well suited to such a tour because of his drawing of 
the soul of a character — a soul that, like Mary's, 
was born to comfort, a soul sent here rather to as- 
suage a nation's hurts than to add to its gaiety, a 
soul whose great gift of bringing peace could find 
its full expression only when bodies were being 
put through an agony of suffering — -this play, 
glorifying the Red Cross Nurse, was chosen, and 
through three weeks of one-night stands we trav- 
elled. 

Before we reached each town, auction sales had 
been held, and single seats were sold for $200, $300, 
and $500, and boxes for $2,000 and $3,000. 

The company played "OUT THERE" rever- 
ently and conscientiously. The audiences rose in 
their full emotional force to the players and to the 
cause. We had a tour of small discomforts, many 
humorous happenings and great financial returns, 
to be exact, $683,142.15 being collected for the Red 
Cross, and came back better men and women, hav- 
ing realised that although America may be a coun- 
try of mixed nationalities the mixture has not di- 
luted its patriotism. There is always a tear and a 
thrill when Frenchmen shout "Vive la France," and 
in the stiff, stand-at-attention-nothing-else-matters 
attitude of the English when their national anthem 
is played — for the first time my countrymen gave 



Is Necessary to the Plot 1X 

it me. Night after night they shouted at the sight 
of their flag and at the sound of their song. 

It's too bad we've stopped! 

Once more a feeling of helplessness comes over 
one at having to go about only personal tasks. 
They don't seem to matter. 

Good-bye, fellow players — fellow Americans! I 
leave the reader to catch a glimpse of what a kindly, 
childish people you are ; to hold an affection for fel- 
low countrymen who poured their money into the 
Red Cross coffers ; to get a new angle on the hotel 
proprietors who, in the towns I mention, were not to 
be outdone in patriotism, and made things so easy 
for us; to read the story of three weeks of intense 
living when every day was crowded with incident, 
every hour one pulsated as part of one's own coun- 
try, and every minute one felt the brotherhood of 
man and the sisterhood of woman wrapping one 
like a cloak because we all met for a common cause 
— love of country. 




THE READING OF THE PLAY 



"OUT THERE" 

A Dramatic Composition 

by 
J. HARTLEY MANNERS 

THE CAST 

PART ONE: INSPIRATION 

^A ROOM IN A LODGING HOUSE DURING THE AUTUMN, 
OF 1915 

"'aunted" Annie Miss Laurette Taylor 

"Princess" Lizzie Miss Helen Ware 

"Old Velvet" . . . . . Miss Beryl Mercer 

'erb Mr. H. B. Warner 

Monte . . . . . . . Mr. James T. Powers 

Dr. Hanwell Mr. George Arliss 

A few words from Mr. Burr Mcintosh 

PART TWO: DEVOTION 

THE "ORANGE WALK" 

The Surgeon Mr. George Arliss 

The Irishman Mr. Chauncey Olcott 

The Cockney Mr. O. P. Heggie 

The Canadian Mr James K. Hackett 

The Scotchman . . . Mr. George MacFarlane 

The American Mr. George M. Cohan 

Gabrielle Miss Julia Arthur 

The Help Miss Laurette Taylor 

xi 



xii THE CAST 

PART THREE: REVELATION 
DIVISION 1— MRS. HUDD'S ROOMS 

Mrs. Hudd Miss Beryl Mercer 

Miss Elizabeth Hudd .... Miss Helen Ware 

Herbert Hudd Mr. H. B. Warner 

Mr. Montague Marsh . . Mr. James T. Powers 

DIVISION 2— A PUBLIC PLACE 
The Nurse Miss Laurette Taylor 

Mrs. Minnie Maddern Fiske 

will deliver a Red Cross Appeal written expressly for these gala 

performances and following this 

Mme. Eleanora de Cisneros 

will sing 



PORTRAITS 

Laurette Taylor Frontispiece 

PAGE 

The Reading of the Play xi 

Hartley Manners 17 

George Arliss 18 

George M. Cohan 22 

Helen Ware 24 

Chatjncey Olcott 26 

Mrs. Fiske 30 

De Wolf Hopper 32 

Julia Arthur 34 

H. B. Warner 38 

George MacFarlane 40 

Beryl Mercer 42 

James K. Hackett 42 

James T. Powers 48 

Eleanora De Cisneros 50 

O. P. Heggie 54 

Burr McIntosh 56 

A Red Cross Nurse 58 



xm 



THE GREATEST OF THESE- 




HARTLEY MANNERS 



"THE GREATEST OF THESE" 

Monday, May 13, 1918. 9 :15 a.m. 

Left the Pennsylvania Station, New York, at 
9:15 a.m. 

We all have cute, little, uncomfortable rooms, 
so we have to look each other in the face only when 
impulse moves us. For the married ones there is 
no escape. You sit opposite each other and gaze 
and gaze until the sight becomes blurred with the 
eternal nearness of "the beloved face." However, 
I drew a nice one, and I like to look! 

Had lunch with Mr. Toohey, our press-agent, 
whose business it is to coax some sacred anecdote 
from you to be blazoned forth as a reason why "you 
are you." I unfolded to his listening ears long 
tales of anything, hoping he wouldn't have time to 
interview the other stars! 

It's my first experience in an All-Star cast. 
They're the funniest lot! They say "Good morn- 
ing" an' everything! It's quite a pleasant thing 
to find an "all-star," who plays only "all-stars" 
(Disraeli, Paganini, Hamilton, etc.) ask you, 
"Why does a chicken cross the road?" Of course, 
it wasn't really about a chicken. It concerned 
cheese, was just as funny and not so old. The 

17 



18 "THE GREATEST OF THESE" 

only unreasonable request was George Cohan's ask- 
ing for a red-white-and-blue spotlight. But I have 
an idea he was spoofing Mr. Tyler. Mr. Tyler, our 
Manager, is the man who has to look pleasant, and 
with exactly the same degree of pleasantness for 
each star. There is a shade of difference for the 
"staresses," but that's out of deference to our spring 
hats. 

We arrive in Washington presently and I'll 
wager the Fifteen stars won't have the people at 
the station that Mary Pickford or Charlie Chaplin 
had ! Yet one of us might have worn yellow curls. 
And there really exists in the company an awfully 
funny pair of shoes. 

Basta! 




GEORGE A.RLISS 



Washington, May 14, 1918. 12:30 a.m. 
We opened to-night to $17,146 — the capacity 
house brought $6,824, the auction had brought pre- 
miums amounting to $9,322, and Nora Bayes 
paid $1,000 for the autographed programme. 
Millionaires sat in the house, and a hard-working 
actress paid a thousand dollars for the President's 
signature — she could have had all the others for the 
asking! I think that explains our place in the 
scheme of things. We were meant to illustrate 
that part of the Bible which says "It is more blessed 
to give than to receive." We of the stage give 
always — of our money, our talents, our intellect. 
Thank goodness, America is starting to employ the 
stage, in time of trouble, as she does the mechanics, 
the writer, the financiers. In England the theatre 
has a dignity it lacks here, because always in Eng- 
land the actors are made to feel that they are a 
necessary part of their country. When money is 
needed they band together unselfishly and get it. 
Every year all-star benefits are given under the 
patronage of the King for the Royal General 
Theatrical Fund. In England the actor has a 
social position not solely on account of his acting 
ability, but because he is a necessary force outside 
the theatre. Sir Henry Irving accepted a knight- 
hood not for personal glorification but to add a new 

19 



20 "THE GREATEST OF THESE" 

dignity to his beloved profession. For the same 
reason it is a great joy to realise that we are en- 
rolled under the Red Cross banner. And to play 
before the President as a part of his effort to carry 
this war to a successful finish, makes us all feel nec- 
essary and, therefore, naturally, happy. 
Vive le President! 

Hints on how to become President. 
The President was invited for eight o'clock. He 
arrived at eight o'clockl 



Baltimore, May 15, 1918. 12:30 a.m. 

Baltimore must be ninety per cent. American 
— it is absolutely one hundred per cent, for the Red 
Cross ! 

Our receipts to-night totalled $28,652 — ten thou- 
sand more than its sister-city, Washington ! 

It was a thrilling and proud moment to face 
suddenly the electric sign over the Academy of 
Music and to see its space filled so — 




To realise how worthily filled in this particular 
instance ! 

Poor old sign, that has held so many names, good, 
bad and indifferent ! Good old band of stars who 
submerged their personalities into one whole repre- 
sented by that Red Cross announcing our appear- 

21 



22 " THE GREATEST OF THESE " 

ance! Where are the moods and tenses by which 
a star is supposed to be exclusively controlled? 
Have they disappeared because of the quality of 
this particular lot? Is it because people who are 
big enough to put up with the expense and discom- 
fort — particularly the discomfort — of three weeks 
of one-night stands, are big even in the little things 
such as courtesy and consideration for others? 

We are all so determined not to be stars that 
funny things have happened. After the first act 
we take a company call — Harry Warner, Jimmie 
Powers, Helen Ware, George Arliss, Beryl Mercer 
and I. We all gathered by the door and — darn it! 
— we left the centre of the stage naked. Poor old 
centre! It seemed to shriek out, "I've been a good 
friend to all of you — why desert me in front of a 
$28,000 house?" On the fourth curtain I could 
stand its tearful voice no longer, but jumped plumb 
into the middle. And I've been explaining why 
ever since! 

I keep wondering what Mrs. Fiske is like. At a 
distance I adore her but one feels one must go care- 
fully with her. Some friends you achieve, and 
some you thrust yourself upon. 

Burr Mcintosh sold the autographed programme 
for $1,500. 

Baltimore sho' am some city! 

tVoila! 




OEORGE M. COHAN 



Wednesday, May 15th, 1918. 6:00 p.m. 

We have played a matinee at Wilmington to 
$11,999. There was no auction sale of seats here, 
and no programme was sold as we had to rush to 
catch the train in time to play in Philadelphia to- 
night. The committee at Wilmington gave us all 
red roses and some sweet ladies kissed their hands 
as we left the hotel. The only unusual happening 
at Wilmington was that a man gave $7,000 to the 
Red Cross on condition that we played the first 
scene of the last act, which we had intended to 
eliminate in order to ring up on time in Philadel- 
phia. But in view of an additional $7,000 to the 
cause we are working for, even Philadelphia will 
have to wait. The donor's name is Mr. Scott, and 
I think he's big enough to star with us. 

Oh, yes! George Cohan refuses to dress with 
Arliss! He says Arliss is too tough.* He doesn't 
mind the language, but he can't stand the yellow 
tobacco-juice! So I understand he's to be paired 
off with O. P. Heggie, the man of whom Mrs. 
Patrick Campbell said, when he wouldn't accept 
a reduction of salary, "You have the eyes of the 
Virgin Mary and the soul of a miser," — two things 

* The joke of the above is that Mr. Arliss is a most fastidious 
man — a twentieth century Beau Brummel, only nicer! Oh much! 

23 



24 "THE GREATEST OF THESE" 

that stay with the owner, unlike yellow tobacco- 
juice, so George won't mind. 
All this is irreverent, but comic? 



' 







HELEN WARE 



Thursday, May 16th, 1918. 
Philadelphians — $23,074 worth of them — 
waited last night until ten o'clock for the curtain 
to rise on "Out There'' and most of them stayed 
till one this morning to see the finish. We ex- 
pected to be a little late, but one of the motor 
trucks carrying our scenery broke down, and it took 
hours to fix it. The Philadelphia programme sold 
for $1,500, the same as at Baltimore. During the 
two hours' wait from eight till ten the company, 
in their street clothes, entertained the waiting audi- 
ence impromptu, George Cohan singing "Over 
There," Chauncey Olcott "Mother Machree," 
Madame Cisneros "Come Back to Erin." Julia 
Arthur recited "The Battle Hymn of the Repub- 
lic," Helen Ware "Carry On," and Jimmie Powers 
held the audience — as one of the papers said — in 
the hollow of his voice with a home-made poem 
which went something like this, — 

"Would you like to see the Bowery changed to 

Strasse Germany? 
Would you like to stop our singing 'My Country 

Tis of Thee'? 
Would you like to hear Americans singing 'Die 

Wacht am Rhein'? 
Would you like the Metropolitan to be Mr. 

Wagner's shrine? 

25 



26 "THE GREATEST OF THESE" 

No, you wouldn't! No, you wouldn't! 
I'm sure you'd rather die. 
Keep a-thinking you may have to 
If you don't start in and buy. 

"Would you like a sausage for a chain, for they'll 

take your gold away ? 
Would you like to say 'Guten Morgen' instead 

of old 'Good-day'? 
Would you like the smell of sauerkraut a-cook- 

ing in the pot ? 
Would you like to 'Hoch der Kaiser', and hock 

everything you've got? 

No, you wouldn't! No, you wouldn't! 
I'm sure you'd rather die. 
Keep a-thinking you may have to 
If you don't start in and buy. 

"Would you like to 'Hoch der Kaiser' with every 

drink you take? 
Would you like to be insulted and treated like 

a snake? 
Would you like to have for breakfast a piece of 

German cheese? 
Would you like to have Limburger wafted to 

you on a breeze? 

No, you wouldn't! No, you wouldn't! 
I'm sure you'd rather die. 
Keep a-sniffing! You may have to 
If you don't start in and buy. 

"Would you like to see your baby dying on its 
mother's breast? 
Would you like to see some flowers on your sis- 
ter spelling 'Rest' "? etc., etc., etc. 

Nice, impulsive, small children actors and 
actresses are ! Frightfully proud and intense about 




CHAIWCKY OW'OTT 



" THE GREATEST OF THESE " 07 

their work, but always reserving a tremendous ca- 
pacity for play, knowing that this is the fluid with 
which to store one's motor for a long drive of hard 
work. 

The delay kept Mrs. Fiske from appearing until 
ten minutes to one. During all those hours she 
sat patiently waiting, curiously quiet yet most vi- 
brantly alive, nothing moving except her foot which 
kept up an incessant tapping. Isn't it interesting 
when a placid, still personality sort of chugs under- 
neath like a Pierce- Arrow? Being a Ford myself 
— all noise and rattle — I admire tremendously the 
other thing. We both have our places in the world. 

The "tired business man" of Philadelphia must 
be in an ungovernable humour this morning. Just 
think! He sat for five hours in one seat! Gen- 
erally we have waited for the audience, and the 
only time we ever kept them waiting, we wept to 
think that they should be so abused. 

Good-bye, Philadelphia! Do you suppose Wil- 
mington paid us that $7,000 as a sort of saucy joke 
on you? 

P.S. — George Cohan has nicknamed Madame 
Eleanora de Cisneros. She is now known 
as Madame Scissors! 



Brooklyn, Friday, May 17th, 1918. 

The business everywhere is limited only by the 
capacity of the theatre, the enthusiasm by the capac- 
ity of the individual. 

Brooklyn brought the Red Cross $22,334, includ- 
ing $1,450 for the programme. Burr Mcintosh 
ranged the gamut of emotion and tried the entire 
octave of his voice in his efforts to instil pride, or 
pity, in fact he didn't care what, into Brooklyn so 
as to get her to top the highest price previously paid 
— $1,500. But, no. Mrs. Leibmann (I think that 
is the buyer's name) was sport enough up to four- 
teen hundred and fifty, but the other fifty was 
just one of those things that keep life interesting — 
the proverbial last straw that might possibly have 
broken her husband's back. 

Woman-like, she may have felt easier telling her 
husband that she got it for fourteen fifty while 
other cities had to pay fifteen hundred. The eter- 
nal bargain interests our sex just as much as that 
infernal triangle. Only one is a bargain. The 
other is heavily paid for! Ahem! However, 
three cheers for Mrs. Leibmann! 

Just imagine Brooklyn giving us that splendid 
capacity! 

At the end of the first act we were presented with 
American Beauties by three pretty Brooklyn young 

28 



"THE GREATEST OF THESE" 29 

ladies. They came on the stage in charming eve- 
ning dresses. Jimmie Powers thought he was back 
in musical comedy, rubbed his eyes, forgot he had a 
name and proper birth (I suppose that's what we 
mean by the distinction, "legitimate" actor), and 
looked at them as much as to say, "Why, dearie, 
this is not your number." I obstructed his view 
as much as possible, but he hasn't been the same 
man since. 



New York City. May 17 and 18 9 1918. 

Friday night, $32,998! 

Mr. Henry P. Davison, the General Manager of, 
the American Red Cross, opened the evening with 
a speech — mostly in honour of our beloved stage 
and its people, which I thought a sweet and gra- 
cious thing to do. 

"Familiarity breeds contempt." Does it also 
breed small receipts? The house was filled in New 
York (the hatchery for stars) but the premiums 
paid were much smaller than in the towns where 
the inhabitants had not seen so much of us. Of 
course, the play has never been seen in the other 
towns. A run of six months in New York at 
regular prices may have put people off the 
premiums. 

Saturday Matinee, $6,524. 

Saturday Evening, $17,939. 

The total receipts for our first week, $160,666. 

As a manager (now advanced in rank to actor) 
said, "that's a good season's receipts." 

The Saturday matinee was uneventful — as most 
matinees are — giving one the maximum of fatigue 
for the minimum of response. Enthusiasm is evi- 
dently a night-blooming cereus. 

Ah! But the last performance was an event in 
my life! I sang at Caruso's price — $500 an aria. 

30 




\IK>. FISKE 



THE GREATEST OF THESE SI 

Miss Arthur and I went down in the aisles to make 
collections for the Red Cross. A man offered $500 
to the Red Cross for an imitation of George Cohan. 
As you know, anybody can give a bad imitation 
of "The Yankee Doodle Boy," and I did. Then 
the man wanted to buy an imitation of Chauncey 
Olcott at the same price. This was more difficult, 
but, feeling that the only lack in my effort would 
be voice— and perhaps the man paying for it 
wouldn't care whether it was good or bad — I gave 
forth "Inniskillen" ! Now I'm quite shameless — 
I'd sing "Ai'da" if it would bring money to the Red 
Cross. (I know it would bring them patients.) 
However, there proved to be one man who held the 
same opinion as I do about my singing, and he 
offered $5,000 for five short songs. But somebody 
back stage had to catch a train, so the audience was 
spared. The Red Cross was the only loser ! 

Later. 

My heart is broken! Some one said my cabaret 
stunt was not dignified! So here is where I speak 
my mind. 

I doubt very much whether the men who are 
fighting for us appear dignified as they fall in the 
mud, shot through, having made of themselves a 
human wall between the Hun and us. It's the 
cause they think of, not how they look. 

It was also suggested that it was not consistent 
with the dignified future I hoped to make for my- 



32 "THE GREATEST OF THESE" 

self on the American stage. There will be no 
future for anybody, on any stage, unless we forget 
"our very own selfish selves" for at least "the dura- 
tion of the war." 

Dignity should be elastic — so much at such-and- 
such a function, and as little as possible at another. 
A minister who preaches the word of God has a 
dignity, no matter how poorly he may speak, be- 
cause of his subject. So I feel about one's country. 

Dignity! It's a funny word to look at — all 
points and arrows, like a porcupine's quills, and 
was meant to be used in the same manner, as a 
protection. You should know it's there, but it 
should not be ever present. That's tiresome. I 
will sell whatever dignity I have to help bind up 
a soldier's wounds — and trust to luck, and Hartley 
Manners, for my future on the stage. 

As Shylock said, "What, are you not answered 
yet?" 

And, with Portia, "Earthly power doth then 
show likest God's when humanity seasons dignity." 

P.S. For the sake of the people who know nothing 
and care less about the theatre, I would like to menr 
tion that Hartley and I are joined in "holy deadlock 9 ' 
and as a wife I have a right to look to him for his love, 
honour, obedience and plays. 




DE WOLF HOPPER 



Providence. Monday, May 20th, 1918. 

Here, for the first time, we had some empty- 
seats ! 

Good old Burr Mcintosh once more wept and 
implored them not to disgrace Providence by allow- 
ing us to play here to less than in Wilmington, 
urged them to come across for the programme and 
force the receipts up beyond those of the afore- 
mentioned town. Somebody here must have hated 
Wilmington with a Hun-like fury. The bidding 
was splendid, and the autographed programme 
finally realised $8,500. 

Imagine it ! 

This increase of the gross receipts was more than 
sufficient to save the honour of Providence. And 
now Boston is going to be so mad when it hears 
what its little cousin paid for the programme! 

Burr Mcintosh is a real orator. He enters a 
town, conceives a mad passion for it, talks to its 
citizens about its beauty, its intelligence, etc., etc. 
But woe to any audience that won't buy that pro- 
gramme! They will hear things about their city 
that will make them move out the next day. A 
successful speaker, I take it, is one who can argue 
both sides of a case equally well. 

Cohan lost his dignity last night! So far he has 
been most legitimate, but a local joke about Fox 

33 



34 " THE GREATEST OF THESE " 

Hill crept in. He stopped the play absolutely 
after his exit — He came back and sang "Over 
There." This is a purple tour for those who cant 
sing! 







JULIA ARTHUR 



Boston. Tuesday, May 21st, 1918. 

In this town — and included in that was the price 
cajoled from the audience for the autographed 
programme, $12,800 — "Providence stepped in," 
according to quotation. 

At every second sentence Mcintosh would say, 
"But Providence bid $8,500!" The Bostonians 
were wildly responsive and thrillingly enthusi- 
astic. After long observation I venture to sug- 
gest that the only people who know how to burn 
to their fullest and fiercest are those who spend 
their lives hooverising their fuel. That is why 
magnificent lives go crashing, burnt to a crisp, 
when once they take fire. A succession of small 
fires stirs nobody. A tremendous blaze makes 
even a sodden Nero want to sing. Boston, like 
London, surprised me with its unexpected light- 
nings. 

"Out There 33 suits the time, the tour and the 
cause. It is played most unexpectedly uniformly, 
seeing it is by an all-star cast. It is awfully like 
sending a lot of high officers into battle — each one 
thinks of a different mode of attack. 

By the way, the manner in which one of our 
managers solved the difficulty of favoritism was 
rather sweet. Just as everybody has one favour- 
ite German who should not be interned, so every 

35 



36 "THE GREATEST OF THESE" 

manager has one favourite star who is the Saturn 
of the heavens (in the manager's mind) . Well, Mr. 
Walton Bradford had to choose (in his mind) 
which of the stars he would commandeer a taxi for 
at the depot, — for Mrs. Fiske, Miss Julia Arthur, 
Miss Helen Ware, Miss Beryl Mercer, Madame 
Cisneros or me. The Lord helped him! Burr 
Mcintosh has been incapacitated by an accident 
to his foot to such a degree that he has to use a 
wheel-chair. So it is sweet now to see how 
"Braddy" rushes for a wheel-chair for Mcintosh, 
and leaves the stars' maids to scramble for taxis for 
their mistresses. 

One ingenuous lady asked me whether we tossed 
up for the choice of dressing-rooms! 

George Cohan says he is going to write a book 
called "My Four Years in the Second Act." 

Note: This act lasts an hour and a quarter during 
which time George M. was reclining on a bed ! 

To-night I gave my "swan song" — somebody of- 
fered $500 to the Red Cross for an imitation of 
Chauncey Olcott. It is not the fear of any loss of 
dignity that stops me, but dread of losing Chaun- 
cey's regard. Methinks he looks at me with men- 
acing eye ever since. 

Why are people afraid of others? I want most 
frightfully to talk to Mrs. Fiske, but one rarely 
sees her, and the only opening speech I can think 
of is, "Do you play bridge?" If she should say 
"No," where do I go from there? 



New Haven, Wednesday, May 22nd, 1918. 

The manager of the Taft Hotel here gave us the 
use of rooms during our stay; we are leaving 
after the performance. I understand that the 
managers of the Iroquois Hotel, at Buffalo, and 
the Blackstone Hotel and the Stratford in Chicago, 
have arranged to do the same. So "Cast your 
bread upon the waters, etc." is not altogether a 
myth. 

Here we took for the Red Cross $31,091, which 
is remarkable when you contrast the size of New 
Haven and its receipts with, say, for instance the 
size of New York and the receipts of its first per- 
formance, $32,998. 

The autographed programme sold for $7,100, a 
sum that would have been very greatly increased 
but that the auctioneer could not be allowed the 
time necessary to work it up, as we had to catch 
the 11:30 train. 

Everywhere we realise what very great credit is 
due to De Wolf Hopper who travels ahead of us 
and auctions the seats. 

Colonel and Mrs. Ullman gave us a lovely din- 
ner before the play, and as we were seated at the 
enormous table Jimmie Powelrs looked the two 
miles across and said, "Would you pass the salt, 
Miss?" 

37 



Buffalo. Thursday, May 2Srd } 1918. 

This city, I am certain, will prove of historic 
value, for here George Arliss almost missed the 
train. 

I had some private information, which I mys- 
teriously imparted to him, as to the train being 
held for us. He, with characteristic masculine 
credulity (Ha!) believed me. It is quite true — my 
"inside information" almost caused Hartley and 
me, also, to miss the train. But, seeing that Mr. 
Tyler, our manager, always embraces us when we 
catch one, this little attribute of charm on our side 
would never make Buffalo known. But Disraeli- 
Paganini-George-Always-Punctilious- Arliss arriv- 
ing running must have been a sight for the gods. 

"The proof of the pudding is in the eating," and 
"The test of a man is in his haste," so, even with 
the legend burning in his brain that "Time and 
trains wait for no man," George- Always-Punctil- 
ious-Arliss lagged and helped a poor, tired maid 
of mine named Maria Theresa Chicco to carry a 
bag. "By the little things ye shall know them," 
or, equally well, "By the one-night stands." 

This event was of such international importance 
I forgot to tell you receipts here were $38,073, the 
autographed programme selling for $13,800. 

38 




H. B. WARNER 



Chicago, Friday and Saturday, 
May 24 and 25, 1918. 

My! How Chicago has changed! I hardly 
recognised it! A certain prominent citizen hasn't 
had a drink for three years. Moderation spelt 
nothing to him, so he made it nothing. Christian 
Science has many unconscious members. The 
only real cures I have heard of have been made by 
one's own personal physician, the Mind. No 
wonder people crow when they brag of being Cap- 
tains of their souls! "It takes a bit o' doin'." The 
mind says, "Stop ruining your body, or I shall 
have to leave you." The body thereupon foregoes 
its poison, and for want of it rocks like a ship in a 
storm. If the mind can hold on to the wheel, one 
comes through. Without this divine assistance, 
man-made medicine is impotent. 

Ha! This has nothing to do with the all-star 
tour and is not of importance to the general world, 
but to show what a desperate case this prominent 
citizen was, I offer this proof. He thought I had 
changed my hair. Any man who sees you a 
brunette when intoxicated and an amber blonde 
when sober, is an exceptionally versatile and 
unique imbiber and deserves mention among us 
immortals. 

We opened to $22,035, a jammed, enthusiastic, 

39 



40 "THE GREATEST OF THESE" 

beautiful lot of patriots. The programme brought 
$15,750, Mcintosh calling in turn upon all the 
cities we have visited on the tour as one invokes all 
the saints when one is in trouble. "Please, please, 
please don't let Providence beat you! $8,500!" 
Then, "Are you going to be downed by Boston 
with $12,800?" Then, "Now for Buffalo, that 
paid $13,800 for it." And, bless him, he sold it to 
Chicago for $15,750. 

Afterwards we went to a party given by the 
Cliff Dwellers, then on to one given by the man- 
ager of the Stratford Hotel for Helen Ware. 

On Saturday, at the matinee we took $7,978, the 
programme fetching $3,200. And in the evening 
we had a $48,062 house and the programme 
brought in $12,000, making the total receipts for 
the week for the Red Cross $259,000. 

On Saturday night the Press Club gave a supper 
to George M. Cohan, and Frank Tinney told a 
funny story. It was not quite modest and I don't 
know how it will look in script but, as he told it, 
it seemed the prattling of a round-faced babe. 
Here it is ! 

A sailor had the French flag tattooed on his 
left arm, the British flag on his right arm, and the 
American flag on his chest. Another sailor said, 
"My! How patriotic you are to have the French 
flag on your left arm, the British flag on your right 
arm, and the American flag on your chest !" And 
he said, "Oh, my! That ain't nothin'! I'm sittnV 
on the Kaiser and Hindenburg." 

Hartley made a speech urging Cohan to write 




GEORGE MACFARLANE 



"THE GREATEST OF THESE" 41 

the great American play of the future, Madame 
Cisneros urged him to write the great American 
opera of the future, and Cohan said he would do 
those two little things that night! One man said 
to me, "Future? Crackers! What's the matter 
with you? Little Georgie has his future!" 

This sort of admirer is in Class C ( something the 
matter with them, apt to be a hindrance to the 
army at a critical moment). Any time one has 
no future it is time to ask for a pension. Even 
Bernhardt (aged 72) prepares a future by produc- 
ing a poet grand-daughter to keep her memory 
green on earth when she is vibrating the heavens 
with her extolling of the Lord ! 

One must see through the molasses of flattery 
and buy oneself a hair shirt. If life becomes too 
slippery one slides to the bottom. To slide up- 
ward would be against the law of things. One 
must climb, and climbing means effort, and effort 
means something not easy to you. My hair shirt 
was a fling at Shakespeare. I'm going to try the 
same shirt again, but wear it in a different manner 
— inside out ! Just as every cloud has a silver lin- 
ing I am sure every hair shirt has a bald spot. 

I'm very involved, but that's my sex, and writ- 
ing is not my talent, and this diary will prove a 
hair shirt to anybody looking for literary style. 

I don't progress with Mrs. Fiske. We have 
such fatiguing journeys, and I don't like to in- 
trude. She received a loud, long and sincere wel- 
come in Chicago. 



St Louis. Monday, May 27ih 3 1918. 

We travelled all day Sunday and arrived filthy 
with coal-dust and exhausted by the heat. Part 
of the time we played bridge. 

I know one actress who interviewed her prospec- 
tive company in this manner. Do you play bridge? 
Tennis? Golf? Are you companionable? Then 
— if they were proficient in these things — her 
manager considered their ability as actors. This 
may sound unbusinesslike, but it isn't. After a 
day in the country one has more charm and vitality 
to give one's audience because of the previous hours 
spent collecting those precious things where they 
grow. To sway anything your way, you must be 
the stronger. An actress has before her at night 
hundreds of people, of different natures and 
imaginations, and in different walks of life. If, 
she is fresh and alert she can swing them all into 
her mood, but without the full force of her mag- 
netic strength, half — sometimes all — of them slip 
through the loophole of her weariness or depres- 
sion, and she says, "What a funny lot they are to- 
night!" 

There is no existence so devoid of meaning as 
"the one-night stands," none so fatal to progress 
as any kind of forced and hurried travelling. It 
is the instinct of self -protection fully developed 

42 




BERYL MERCER 



" THE GREATEST OF THESE w 43 

and understood that makes an actress or actor want 
companions who realise the truth of something that 
Flaubert wrote, "To accomplish anything one 
should think like a god and live like a farmer." 

Here we played to $32,282 and the autographed 
programme brought in $18,100. 

It was hot. The doors had to be left open, so it 
was difficult to play, the dialogue going like this, 
"I am 'aunted" (Toot-to-o-ot). Farver 'ad the 
call, an' 'e answered it. (Clang-clang!) An' I'm 
sure 'e's 'appier 'cause 'e did. (Brr-r-r-r, bang. 
Brakes on!)." A mass of fans and programmes 
moved endlessly back and forth, right and left, until 
one seemed to be rising and falling on a paper sea. 
Every time any one on the stage moved suddenly ', 
the rest of the company seemed in danger of 
drowning. As somebody once said of an intense 
actor, "His skin acted beautifully." Between the 
heat, the noise, and the incessant waving, St. Louis 
seemed a sort of friendly hell where patriots were 
gathered together. 

On Sunday night the Country Club gave a 
supper and dance for the company. Everybody 
reported a splendid evening. I couldn't go, which 
means that I was really quite done up, because I 
am the original "Oh yes! I'd love a party!" 

Mrs. Fiske never goes anywhere! We rarely 
see her. What a shame ! Doesn't one get fright- 
fully lonesome? People who know her say she is 
most amusing, and adore her. I'm sure that if 
she hadn't been pushed on to the stage at the age 



44 "THE GREATEST OF THESE" 

of three she would have been a nun. "Seclusion" 
is her second name. I suppose she fascinates me 
because I can't understand it. People supply me 
with a new outlook. Personalities give me mate- 
rial for my work on the stage. My own kind thrill 
me — make me laugh sometimes, hurt me at others, 
but, they always thrill me! Out of contact I ac- 
quire the thousand little things that are of use to 
me. Some natures, perhaps, are so rich in them- 
selves that extra feeding would result in a filled- 
leech-like lethargy. 

My! That's a long spout about things that have 
been said in better fashion by brilliant people. 
It's a wonderful gift, the gift of word-stringing, 
for instance, Masefield's "Like a flaming comet with 
a tail of fire." 

Now for the train to Louisville, the city of beau- 
tiful women and soft voices. 




JAMES K. HACKKTT 



Louisville, Kentucky. 
Tuesday, May 28th, 1918. 
Southern hospitality is a thing I had heard 
about: now I know what it means. This is the 
only town where it was done in a manner consider- 
ing the tiring journeys, the heat, and the hard work 
at night. Mr. A. T. Hert, the chairman of the 
local Red Cross chapter, provided us with motors 
(to be our own for the day) and cards to the races. 
We had supper after the play at the Pendennis 
Club — through the courtesy of the president, Mr. 
Stone. In none of these things were we "chaper- 
oned" by kind strangers to whom we had to talk. 
Just the company; we could ride in silence, eat 
during natural conversation (which is just as restful 
as silence and possible only between people inter- 
ested in the same things). We had a beautiful 
supper, and told each other some funny stories. 
H. B. Warner refused to tell his, until we all took 
an oath that we loved children. Chauncey Olcott 
left, because his two had been heard before and 
didn't go very well. Hartley promised Helen 
Ware that he wouldn't tell a certain one because 
she wanted to tell it, and then Madame Cisneros 
told it before it came to Helen's turn. After 
Young Seymour (the son of the famous William 
Seymour), who is with us as stage director, had 

45 



46 " THE GREATEST OF THESE " 

finished a very naive tale Mr. Bradford, our man- 
ager, insisted that we start for the train. So Mr. 
Arliss told his on the, way to the station, and 
Jimmie Powers says we were all afraid to let the 
turn come round to him, knowing that his would 
be the funniest. 

George Cohan has a fine system for losing 
money. He backed No. 4 on the card in all seven 
races. But some one must have done a lot of 
underhand work, for in no race of the seven that 
day did No. 4 win. Even a horse called "Ameri- 
can Eagle" failed to respond to George's unadul- 
terated red-white-and-blue vibrations. 

The programme incident was most amusing. 
It is getting very difficult for Burr Mcintosh, the 
top price, $18,100, resting with St. Louis. Here it 
reached only $11,850. It was a very long time 
before they started, and then they went along 
fairly quickly, but principally with $50 bids, which, 
of course, take a long time to mount up. The com- 
pany always congregate behind the curtain when 
the bidding starts. At any large sum it's quite a 
sight to see them, led by George Arliss (by Gad!) 
beat the curtain with their sticks. We can't see, 
but it's fun to listen. Here a sweet voice, a very, 
very clear, sweet voice, piped up, "Fifty dollahs!* 
Then every few minutes this most fascinating, 
southern sweet-potato voice would pipe "Fifty 
moah!" Every man behind the curtain fell in love 
with little "Fifty moah!" We all had different 
theories about her looks and her occupation. I de- 



" THE GREATEST OF THESE " 47 

cided she must be a seamstress, a little, delicate, 
old-maid seamstress who loved the stage, was pre- 
vented from going on it in her youth, and wanted 
to possess that autographed programme as one 
keeps a flower or a lock of hair as a rosemary of 
the past that never happened. When the "Fifty 
moahs" reached a thousand dollars, of course, I had 
to discard the pathetic seamstress idea. With the 
help of five stage-hands, the side of the curtain was 
pulled back and I saw little "Fifty moah." She 
stood in the aisle downstairs, in nurse's costume, a 
round, pretty thing of about twenty (from where 
I stood), the kind of girl who holds up a bottle of 
dental wash, offers you a Coca-Cola, peeps through 
the advertisement for a new kind of tire, and 
always looks at you from a magazine cover. She 
has three lovely names, like Mary Millman Byrd, 
or Maryland Boardman Miller. I'll try to find 
out exactly. There she was, the "Sweet Southern 
Rose" whom all the song- writers try to picture. 
Little "Fifty-moah" got the programme, and I'll 
never see the name "Louisville, Kentucky," with- 
out hearing this female Oliver Twist with that 
curious drawl on the word "more" (moah) . What 
a lovely thing a charming trick of speech is! A 
voice is the catch on the heart — more than the face 
— and here were both. Lucky Kentuckian! 



Cincinnati. Wednesday, May 29th,, 1918. 

We travelled all last night in the most blasting 
heat. Several of us were ourselves in need of Red 
Cross services. 

Heat and noise as eternal punishments are not 
possible. We've had both every night this week. 
To continue it for ever and ever — no God could be 
so cruel. There must be some gentler chastise- 
ment, like being trampled by wild horses, or hav- 
ing your eyelashes pulled out. Heat kills all ambi- 
tion, except to find the North Pole. I am sure it 
was a furnace-like day that made Peary, Scott, etc., 
set out for the Land of Ice. 

Noise ! Sound ! No one has ever properly ap- 
preciated or damned them — soft noises — crickets, 
brooks, and rustling trees (Oh, my! Where are 
they now? Gone — like the pale hands beside the 
Shalimar?) make you visualise a gentle, beatific 
God with outstretched hands, flowing white robes, 
and a great tenderness in His heart for even the 
toughest of His makings. 

Singing sound changes Him to a more illuminat- 
ing electrical God. A Greek God, who can run 
and leap, who is ever young and alert, who can 
understand the passionate mistakes of some natures 
and make allowances for the deliberate ones of 
others. 

48 




i \ \l BS T. POWERS 



" THE GREATEST OF THESE " 49 

The noise of tramping troops, the sound of play- 
ing bands, the cheering of patriots seem to make 
Him a God capable of terrible, but righteous, ven- 
geance. Then one sees Him breathing fire, urg- 
ing masses of men to fight for their faith as the 
early Christians did, and later to fight against any- 
thing that besmirches the white banner of Chris- 
tianity, such as slavery, and the race that worship 
Him only as a companion-in-arms! 

But the shunting of trains, the clang of street- 
cars, the scream of engines, — all the man-made 
noises of the business world, transform Him (for 
me) into a large, evil face that grins and waits for 
the ugly rhythm to get you. 

I once had nervous prostration, and when Nature 
re-adjusted my mental balance she forgot the 
soundproof centre. I am afraid of the thunder, 
not of the lightning! 

Cincinnati, for some unknown reason, is built in 
a large hollow. We travelled up the hills through 
a park and looked down on a city protected by a 
large, soft, black canopy of smoke. However, I 
was so ill that I couldn't have enthused over a new 
hat! And for our cause Cincinnati came over the 
top beautifully with $48,803, of which $16,150 was 
for the autographed programme. And here an- 
other fellow-country-lover, Mr. Hill, the manager 
of the Gibson Hotel, gave us proof of his patriot- 
ism. The Gibson Hotel would not allow us to pay 
for even a newspaper or a postage stamp. Our 
money was not acceptable. Others, in the towns 



50 " THE GREATEST OF THESE " 

I have mentioned, gave us rooms, but here the Red 
Cross workers of the stage were allowed to pay 
for nothing. So you see how elastic human nature 
is. You can think on the hills even if you live in 
the hollow of Cincinnati. It has been a wonderful 
journey for the soul. The dirt, the heat, and the 
noise, nothing has penetrated there except the 
glorious consciousness of helping. I am sorry it 
is ending, and I say again, the people of the stage 
know the art of giving. 

Now, on to Columbus! Christopher! What a 
large country our own United States is! As an 
English comedian who travelled it for the first time 
said, "Why give him credit for discovering Amer- 
ica? How could he miss it?" 




ELEANORA DE CISNEROS 



Columbus. Thursday, May 30th, 1918. 

Here was a most earnest proof of patriotism. 
A man had a half-dozen taxicabs waiting at the 
station for us after another hot, sticky night in the 
obnoxious bandboxes they name so prettily. Ours 
was called "Belle Center," and only the first letter 
need be changed for the name to fit as tightly as 
we did. He (the taxi man) slammed the door 
with great pride and called to the driver "No 
charge !" He explained that he was only a poor 
man but that he was happy to do this bit for the 
Red Cross, and had been waiting there since seven 
o'clock — the train was due at that time, but was 
three hours late — to see it through. It was a small 
thing, perhaps, but it was tremendously impressive. 

We played here to $21,225. 

The heat caused a retreat in the "legitimate" 
ranks. A few of them retreated to the marshes of 
farce. At the end of Olcott's song an orange 
started to roll across the stage. MacFarlane at- 
tempted to catch it with a helmet, missed by an 
inch, and but for the protection of a stomach would 
have broken his nose. Powers was responsible for 
the moving orange, the heat for Powers. 

Burr Mcintosh, exhausted with pain, fell asleep 
and for the first time missed his opportunity of 
selling the autographed programme. 

51 



53 "THE GREATEST OF THESE" 

In the first act I had a small attack of hysterics. 
I recovered in a second because I think them very 
funny. You cry, not because you've lost any one, 
or because you've been beaten or feel ill, but just 
because you want to cry. It's so durned unreason- 
able. It happens to me through tiredness or ex- 
treme hot weather. It was in the first act, a scene 
where real tears should have been effective, but it 
only bewildered the audience and stupefied Mr. 
Arliss. 

After the play some nice, kind people took us out 
to the Country Club for supper. The lights on the 
porch were turned out, and we sat under the moon. 
(That is always so obvious — you can't sit in it, or 
on it.) We ate and conversed in a blessed, still 
coolness that almost tempted me to cry again. I 
talked to an awfully jolly man who told me his 
nickname for his wife, hers for him, and what he 
called his baby and his dog. He was an awfully 
nice man, and they were an understanding lot of 
people, and we hated coming back to "Hell — ," I 
mean "Belle Center." 



Cleveland. Friday, May 31st, 1918. 

We played here to $24,167, of which $10,550 
was for the autographed programme. 

In advance of our coming the following notice 
had been sent out to the citizens : — 

Fifteen famous men and women of the American 
stage are coming to entertain you at the Opera 

House May 31st. 
Every penny of proceeds will go to the Cleveland 

Red Cross. 
Every member of this distinguished all-star com- 
pany is paying his or her railroad, dining-car and 

hotel bills. 

All that we have to do is to buy tickets. 

Contrary to what is being done in the other sixteen 

cities where this company is going, Cleveland will 

NOT AUCTION BOXES AND SEATS* 

THERE IS NO HOLD-UP 

Boxes will be specially priced. 
First half of lower floor will be $10 a seat. 

Second half will be $5 a seat. 
Balcony and gallery, $5, $3, $2 and $1 a seat. 
Here is the corrected list of stars who will appear 
— fifteen reasons why you should see this unsur- 
passed aggregation at war prices: 

George Arliss Mdme. Eleanora De 

Julia Arthur Cisneros 

James T. Powers H. B. Warner 

53 



54 THE GREATEST OF THESE " 

George MacFarlane Mrs. Fiske 

Laurette Taylor Helen Ware 

George M. Cohan O. P. Heggie 

James K. Hackett Burr Mcintosh 

Beryl Mercer Chauncey Olcott 

N.B. — Two patron tickets are to be exchanged 

for one ten dollar seat. 

I would like to shake the person warmly by the 
throat who was responsible for the line, 

THERE IS NO HOLD-UP 

I wonder if Cleveland knows this. A friend of 
mine called up to buy a box and was told there 
were none on sale, all had been sold at one hundred 
and fifty dollars. She offered a thousand and, 
after much trouble and argument, got it! I sup- 
pose the originator of that "elegant" phrase con- 
sidered that the Red Cross was being held up by 
Mrs. C for a thousand dollars! 

After the blunder of this short-sighted worker 
for the cause of mercy we played Cleveland only 
because we had the three weeks to do, and couldn't 
afford to miss one performance, even though it was 
to the mere pittance, comparatively, of $10,288 
(the smallest evening receipts of the tour, outside 
of Providence, which is unto Cleveland as David 
unto Goliath, only in this case it was the Goliath 
that had "the jaw-bone of an ass"). 

P.S. — Feeling a doubt about this, I have looked 
it up and find it was Samson who used the 
jaw-bone of an ass. David had only a pea- 




O. P. HEGGIE 



" THE GREATEST OF THESE " 55 

shooter. So we will change it to "It was 
the Goliath (of a town) that had the pea- 
shooter." 
Mark Twain could have played with this idea of 
a pea-shooter and followed it up until — under his 
charmed pen — it blossomed into flower as a thing 
of fun and frolic that made you laugh and wonder 
at the humour in small things. Then, with the 
jaw-bone as a foundation, he would have builded 
you a beautiful jackass that swallowed the pea- 
blossoms and together they formed an alliance with 
Samson and David, and ended this war instanter. 

Being only me, I must beg that you let me off 
any unnecessary elaboration because in my new 
guise as authoress, the jackass and I are closely 
related, and like should spare like. As for the 
other subject, I understand that when you have 
a garden you make three plantings at different 
periods, until you get so sick of "fresh peas from 
the garden" that you give them all to visitors. 

Well, anyway, it wasn't a pea-shooter David had, 
it was a sling-shot — so fineto. 

However, to return! Poor De Wolf Hopper! 
That he should travel alone! Alone, without the 
company of his beloved f ellow-thespians, in solitude 
wend his way to a cold theatre on the most difficult 
of missions (that of coaxing the reluctant dollar 
forth). That, added to the big man's sorrows, 
should be the prefix "Hold-up." That's what it 
meant! "Hold-up" Hopper arrives, and behind 
him his "Forty Thieves." In a tactful manner 



56 " THE GREATEST OF THESE " 

Burr Mcintosh let a little of this be understood, 
and Cleveland (remember that the circular was 
only one Clevelander's mistake) paid $10,500 for 
the autographed programme. As for response to 
our playing, they had no limit, and all of us, after 
having felt a little offended, left the town under- 
standing that "one man does not a city make." 

I know that Cleveland was a "War Chest" city, 
and had done more than its quota; but so were 
Columbus and Philadelphia "War Chest" cities 
and they let us "hold them up" cheerfully, so why 
should the city of Cleveland be proud? 

Now we go on to a city that is willing to pay in 
advance of our coming premiums of over $100,000. 
One hundred thousand dollars, in addition to the 
price of the seats, for one performance!!! I only 
pray that they may have eight-cents-woith of cool 
weather. 




BURR MCINTOSH 



Pittsburgh. Saturday, June 1st, 1918. 

An example of "The first shall be last and the 
last first.' ' The first city of dollars-and-cents 
patriotism we play last, and the last from which we 
expected top returns comes out first. 

Mr. Moore, who married the beauteous Lillian 
Russell, took some of us for a ride to see the beau- 
ties of Pittsburgh. From the top of a green hill 
we were invited to look down at the smoky town. 
Personally, I shut my eyes and thought of Lillian 
Russell. Have you ever seen her as a close-up? 
Oh, Lady, Lady! Sea-green, blue, or were they 
grey eyes? Soft, baby blonde hair! A mouth 
with a sort of uncurling faculty! A sweet voice! 
I wish God had let himself run wild like that when 
He made my face. 

Outside the Moore house was a truck decorated 
with flags of the navy. On it a sailor playing the 
piano, another blowing a cornet, and a fat one 
dancing as light as a piece of thistledown. Lots 
of fat men are light on their feet, but it ain't 
natural, is it? If they are heavy they should be 
heaviest where they touch bottom (on their feet). 

I was greeted with strains of "Peg O' My 
Heart," (the International Scourge, Percy Ham- 
mond called it)— "Rip Van Winkle," Mary Pick- 

57 



58 " THE GREATEST OF THESE " 

ford, Uneeda Biscuits — things that grandchildren 
will be told were popular in grandma's day. 

The truck and the sailors were waiting for Mrs. 
Wheelock, the only woman who holds a commis- 
sion in the U. S. Navy. She came out in a trim 
blue serge skirt, jacket, and sailor hat, with the 
insignia of her rank on her sleeve. She is like 
" 'Aunted Annie." She can get recruits even in 
cities where "they don' know there's a war on." 
"She puts you to sleep, an' w'en y' waike up y're 
in the navy." She talks and they sing. And they 
present such a jolly happy picture that every man 
thinks that that is what fighting means — a truck, 
a piano, and Sailor Riley singing "Over There." 

The matinee brought in $6,597 at $5 prices, the 
auction having been held for the evening perform- 
ance only, so that there were no premiums at the 
matinee. The auction of the autographed pro- 
gramme was also reserved till the evening per- 
formance. 

It was so warm that Mrs. Fiske found sufficient 
excuse to push her desire for solitude to extreme 
limits. We searched the theatre for her, and at 
last discovered her on the roof — dressing on the 
roof. She is a most feminine, darling person, and 
why she withdraws her gentle self from us is a Sam 
Lloyd puzzle. There are some people you plead 
with to "get thee to a nunnery." They never go. 
As Peter said when the manicurist walked out 
of heaven to the other place to have her hair 




A RED CROSS M RSE 



" THE GREATEST OF THESE " 59 

curled, 

Heigho! That's the way! 
The peaches go. 
Only the lemons stay ! 

Good-bye, Mrs. Fiske! I know now how Dante 
felt never knowing Beatrice. 

David Warn* eld helped the great auction. Some 
auctioneer! Over $100,000 worth! The Pitts- 
burgh burghers were marvellous. The loosening 
of their purse-strings did not mean the tightening 
of their souls. They poured out enthusiasm to us 
as generously as they had poured out their gold, 
and when they went over the top for the pro- 
gramme with $20,500, twenty thousand five hun- 
dred dollars {the record) the curtain was raised, 
and we of the stage applauded the audience. They 
applauded us. We gave three cheers for them. 
They gave three cheers for us, and we were as 
happy as two people in love, who admire each other 
in each other so thoroughly that the whole world 
seems heaven and the two of them the only perfect 
specimens in it. 

It was extraordinary the beautiful spirit of hu- 
maneness that joined the stage and the public that 
night. In a translation of Bourget's "The Night 
Cometh," a man says to his wife as they face each 
other in a crisis, "Now that we are so 'transparent/ 
tell me the truth." That is what we were, "trans- 
parent." And the condition is more rare than you 



60 "THE GREATEST OF THESE" 

may think. They saw us glad to our souls that 
the Red Cross had benefited so beautifully through 
us. We saw them a band of people with love of 
their country and pride of their city shining 
through their conventional white shirts. Bless 'em ! 



New York City. Sunday, June 2nd, 1918. 
Home! Room to walk about! A basin in 
which water runs truly hot and cold! A bed that 
stays tranquil ! The same old Hudson to look out 
on! Not -a train within earshot! And with an 
appreciation that passeth all understanding of 
Rupert Brooke's poem, 

THE GREAT LOVER 

These I have loved: 

White plates and cups, clean gleaming, 
Ringed with blue lines ; and feathery, faery dust ; 
Wet roofs, beneath the lamp-light ; the strong crust 
Of friendly bread; and many-tasting food; 
Rainbows; and the blue bitter smoke of wood; 
And ardiant raindrops couching in cool flowers ; 
And flowers themselves, that sway through sunny 

hours, 
Dreaming of moths that drink them under the moon ; 
Then, the cool kindliness of sheets, that soon 
Smooth away trouble ; and the rough male kiss 
Of blankets ; grainy wood ; live hair that is 
Shining and free; blue-massing clouds; the keen 
Unpassioned beauty of a great machine; 
The benison of hot water ; furs to touch ; 

The good smell of old clothes ; and other such 

The comfortable smell of friendly fingers, 

Hair's fragrance, and the musty reek that lingers 

About dead leaves and last year's ferns. . . . 

all the things you can't do, or see, or touch, or smell 
as you rattle through the country on steel rails. 

61 



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